Adoption sex

Eli and I just had the equivalent of adoption sex. We sent off our first application.

When contemplating having a baby, it takes a lot of mental energy. It is a huge decision. It changes the course of your whole life. It is not to be taken lightly. It is scary, it is exciting. When the decision is made to pursue it, then something must be done to start the process. In the case of biological children, it is of course the special time between the husband and wife. The next thing you know, you are pregnant (at least in our case), and then you have the next 9 (really 10) months to figure out how to deal with the fact that a baby is coming and how to wrap your brain around it. The fact that the baby is coming is so real. You might be sick to your stomach, you might blow up like the Michelin man, you might get acne, you definitely get a big belly, you might get swollen feet, you can feel the baby moving, you can see it on ultrasound. All these little things to prepare you mentally for a baby. But the first step to start the ball a rollin is getting jiggy wid it in the bedroom. Then the ball just keeps a rollin and you are just along for the ride.

Not so with adoption. You have to really, really, really know what you want to do. It is not a spur of the moment tumble in the sack. But there is a moment when you decide, "Let's do it. Let's start this process moving." And that is what we did last night. We had adoption sex. We sent in the application. The ball has started rolling.

And we will have plenty of months to wrap our little brains around the idea that a baby is coming. The reminders will not be coming from the often uncomfortable and obvious physical changes that go along with pregnancy (thank God), but will be coming in the form of much paperwork, waiting, phone calls, waiting, court and lawyers, waiting, fingerprinting, waiting, more paperwork, waiting, traveling and lots and lots of money.  I won't be suffering physically from the pregnancy, I won't be waiting, terrified of the coming labor and potential second c-section, but we will be suffering fiscally, making sacrifices, trying to figure out how we are going to pay for this.... But I keep coming back to George Michael, "I got to have faith..." God love him.

Faith - Studio 99